“Often we allow gossipers, jealous hammers, tyrants, psychopaths, busy people or primitives to enter our innermost circle. Ultimately, these are toxic people, fake people who have to keep evaluating what we say and do or what we don’t say and do. “
Because there are people who love drama
There is no doubt that there are large numbers of people around us who are passionate about judging and criticizing the lives of others.
The boredom and lack of goals and hobbies, combined with the lack of joy, means that certain people see the greatest possible satisfaction in sniffing around in other people’s lives and seeking that adrenaline rush that they cannot find in their own lives .
We may all have exhibited such behavior, but the problem arises when this behavior is no longer sporadic. For many, this behavior turns into a way of life.
How did it get to the point that we are surrounded by people who provoke drama?
In most cases , we didn’t choose to be surrounded by these people ourselves. Just as a dog did not choose its abusive master. Here, it is simply determined by the lottery in which we all play and which is called life.
They can be by our side since childhood, friends from school or our boss. You can also be everything at once. You might run into them once in your life, or you might never run into them. But never blame yourself for it.
Statements like “tell me who you are around and I will tell you who you are” are relative. Everyone is who they are, and in your life you repeatedly meet people who are who they are. There is no other way out than not to let them take up any place in our lives. However, taking a place still does not mean the same thing as sharing our life with them.
How can you prevent them from turning your problems and existence into drama?
Courtesy, respect, and emotional distance are your best weapons. The solution is progressive removal.
Convince yourself that you made the right decision to distance yourself. These hurtful behaviors are highly contagious and will not do you any good.
So don’t go around in circles, every person should get to know someone else first in order to decide who stays in their life and who doesn’t. This is what life is made of: decisions.
To be happy, we have to make decisions: without thinking too much and without regret. Your emotional well-being is the foundation of everything else, for you and for those around you. Therefore, it is a good decision to distance yourself from the people who you consider to be unhealthy for you.
Be vigilant about the following:
- Revisiting past private conversations: That person who once listened to us might start playing a dirty game because of the discomfort you feel. She may want to torment you and hurt you. But remember that only you are responsible for what moves you.
- Discomfort is created in your environment: there is no other reality than the one you perceive. Therefore, you shouldn’t pay attention to what this person is saying about those around you.
- Don’t let them speak up for you : Avoid seeing you as a “pack”. No matter how you relate to each other: daughter / mother, friend or spouse. They will want to make it clear to the world that your individuality is a parallel universe.
If you do not belong in this person’s circle and differ from them, it will become easier and easier for you to move away from them physically and emotionally.
Finally, reduce the relationship to a minimum. In fact, it would be even better to end it. The gain for your mental and physical health will be terrific.
And the fact is that some people just come into our lives to set us an example of what we never want to be. And when we move away from them, their shadow represents the best presence in our lives.
A shadow that, thanks to your intuition, couldn’t turn off your light.