Self-sabotage Or The Fear Of One’s Own Size – The Jonas Complex

Self-sabotage or the fear of your own size - the Jonas complex

There is only one person who prevents you from achieving great success:
you see them in the mirror every day.

We have a strange way of restricting ourselves and limiting our potential. We often undergo a chilling internal boycott to keep us from growing. Yes, we hinder ourselves – what madness! Maybe you already know what I’m talking about? Let’s take a look at what’s behind this.

Why do we limit ourselves when we were born with great potential?

A few years ago Abraham Maslow called this phenomenon the Jonas Complex, referring to the passage in the Bible where God commissioned Jonas to carry his message to Nineveh, and Jonas fled because he believed he would not be able to carry out the commission to be able to meet.

Sometimes we literally initiate a walk in the opposite direction of success, knowing that this is the wrong path. It is a cruel form of self-sabotage and is done out of fear of our own greatness.

The demons that cause the Jonas Complex are fear and anxiety which prevent us from developing our ability to be successful. In other words, you know what you are worth to have what it takes and you visualize your success, but act in ways that you also know will not help you achieve your goals. You cross the river to the Valley of Mediocrity for fear of not being up to the success and fail to realize that it takes your own appreciation to reach the top.

Maslow said that just like we fear the worst will happen, we fear the best as well . Perhaps you also identify with this attitude: “ I don’t want everything, but I don’t want anything either, I prefer to stay where I am .”

These fears and worries mean fear of achieving more than others have achieved, and facing the tasks and responsibilities that come with that greatness. Not knowing how to find our way on the horizon, to be arrogant, to fail.

A dark way of creating our own suffering. It is not that we directly suppress our success or pain, rather we curb our own joy. Self-created suffering, self-sabotage, is a completely unnecessary and harmful type of pain.

Overcoming this problem requires a very demanding approach. The only way to eradicate this kind of personal suicide is to turn our attention to the demon of envy that grips us through society. Envy hides the fear that we will not achieve our goals and, if they do, that others might reject us because of it.

There are two ways of responding to the success of others : with lust or with admiration, and unfortunately we are often inclined to the former. Who dares to appear unusual or unique in the face of such an expectation? Not all of us, of course, and not in all areas, so that those who do not have the courage to unconsciously remain in the emotional dependency and engage in the determination for mediocrity.

The prison that each of us has created for himself is made up of different bars and different executioners who stand in front of the doors to watch our breathing and every movement. It is clear that this prison will eventually become our grave, with the inscription that reveals to the rest of the world that we have not lived in suffering, nor in fame and glory, rather unnoticed. We will die with what we have and are buried in the garments of mediocrity and emotional comfort.

It is necessary that we balance our pursuits while keeping our feet on the ground. Most people “sin” too much in one way or another: some look too high and others seem to be digging their own grave. If we observe the real successful people, we can see that they knew how to balance themselves on this problem, that is, to set their goals high but not lose reality in the process.

Fearing success is largely due to our inability to tolerate the uncertainty. We are sick of the need for security, and thus lose confidence in our coping abilities for the things that are to come. We want everything to be fixed, secure and tested a thousand times.

Our need for reinsurance is bestial! It is the way we fraternize with our obsessive thoughts at every step in the face of this “giant called success”. We don’t realize that looking up is believing we are down and that we afford the luxury of feeling inferior, something that will really punish us for life.

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