Resistance is a kind of barrier or obstacle of a conscious or unconscious nature that prevents us from advancing. This resistance can manifest itself either in our thoughts or in our emotions and feelings. In many people, this resistance to a change in growth direction is caused by fear or concern about the pain these changes might cause. But if we want to move forward and change, then we also have to learn to overcome these obstacles.
“The more we do, the more we can do.”
Which factors play a role in resistance?
The fear of the unknown
If we are to leave our comfort zone and go into a great desert that is completely unknown to us, then this can cause worry, fear and even panic in us.
The lack of adequate information
Sometimes we just don’t know what to expect. And one of the greatest human fears is insecurity.
When there is uncertainty, we feel as if we are out of control and have to be in the dark. Regardless, we need to move on and overcome our inevitable insecurities.
The fear of failure
That, too, is one of the greatest fears we have. What if something goes wrong? What if i fail? And what about the pain I’ll feel if I fail? What will the others say if I make a mistake? Will you laugh at me That is probably the fear that paralyzes us the most. But it is also a fear that only exists in our thoughts.
The fear of disappointing others
Most of us have a strong tendency to want to please other people and therefore become dependent on other people’s opinions. And that then leads to the fear of disappointing other people. We fear that others will stop loving us if something goes wrong and we disappoint them or we fear that if we really say what we think or if we are honest with ourselves, they will reject us. We should become aware of this fear so that we can overcome it.
The fear of what others will say
In our society, everyone seems to have what others say in mind. If we do something differently from the rest, we are often pointed at us or accused. At the same time, however, our hypocritical society encourages us to be different and say what goes through our heads. This contrast causes confusion, fear and insecurity in us.
The fear of not being able to do something or learn something
This fear manifests itself in negative thoughts that we impose on ourselves such as: “I can’t do it.” – “I’m so stupid.” – “I just can’t do anything.”
Anything that requires a certain amount of effort robs us of strength. We avoid change and leave things as they are, because a change demands a certain amount of effort and it makes us tired of just thinking about it. Then we say something like, “Why should I change something? The situation is not that bad. “
“Better the known evil than the unknown good”
This well-known Spanish proverb speaks of our comfort zone. Why should we leave our comfort zone when we love it so much? While a change may have positive effects and lead to an improvement in our lives, we are afraid to take the risk because there is a possibility that it could be a negative change.
It is obvious that fear is the main factor that creates resistance in us, and that resistance is a mental barrier that we impose on ourselves. Added to this is the uncertainty and, in some cases, laziness that add to the resistance to taking a step towards change.
Structural resistance to growth
This includes everything that is associated with a change in external circumstances or the environment. Examples of this would be a change of school or course of study, a change in a relationship, a move, etc.
This resistance scares us, makes us feel insecure, makes us fall, and makes us feel negative feelings that we believe are imposed on us by society.
Personal resistance to growth
Personal resistance to growth relates to the three basic pillars of change: wanting something, knowing something, and being able to do something. We can say no to the change and we have every right to do so, but then we have to become aware of it and make sure that it was really our own decision.
However, if we want something, can achieve it and know how to achieve it, then we mustn’t give up too quickly if something seems impossible. When an obstacle comes up, we have to start fighting.
We humans have a tendency to impose and then allow mental barriers to prevent us from achieving what we long for and what we know would make us happy. But there is a simple solution how we can overcome these barriers.
On the one hand, it is about using all of your willpower to overcome. Also, we should consider the following steps:
- We should precisely define our goals and wishes.
- We should get an overview of all possible decisions so that we can then choose a specific one.
- We should list all the things that need to be put into action to achieve this.
- We should then try to put these steps into practice.
- We should think of ways to monitor our progress.
- Perseverance – that is very important. If we really want something, then we mustn’t allow ourselves to give up prematurely.
- We need to think about what can possibly happen. We should know beforehand how to act if something is not working properly.
And now – are you ready for change?
Keep in mind: if you don’t feel dissatisfied or uncomfortable at all, then there is no problem. But where there is no problem, there is no movement towards improvement. And when you have many people by your side who are ready to help and support you, then you are not alone.
If there’s something you’re not really sure about, learn and read about it and ask yourself questions before you jump in the deep end. Because that way it will be a lot easier. And last but not least: if you love yourself, if you believe in what you can achieve and if you are motivated, then you will easily overcome any resistance!