We all know that missing someone who doesn’t miss you and who never gives you a second thought is not healthy. You know it is a mistake to think about what you want instead of facing reality. You are also aware that you are only making yourself suffer, but you just cannot stop the thoughts. However, you don’t seem to be able to avoid all of the things that remind you of the past that make it impossible to move on.
No drug can turn off your memories or remove the pain of missing someone who is no longer in your life. Therefore, your only option is to deal with the situation in a healthy way. After all, that kind of suffering is part of being human. These experiences shape and teach you to be resilient.
We’re not trying to say that suffering is always an integral part of learning. However, there is no point in giving up and despairing when things get difficult. You are usually better prepared than you might think to face life’s challenges. When you put your broken pieces back together you will find that you are stronger than ever.
This is how you stop missing someone who doesn’t miss you
Longing for someone who doesn’t waste a second thought on you is unhealthy, but by no means uncommon. This person is the first thing that comes to mind when you wake up, and the memories you shared with that person will not keep you sleeping at night. During the day, every song, show, restaurant, book, and silly detail will remind you of that one person.
However, living in the past is not healthy. It is critical to your wellbeing that you keep going. However, you also need to understand that these reactions are a normal and common problem. Because there will always be a period of grief in which you have to deal with a variety of feelings, fears, and emotional pain.
As a result, you shouldn’t feel guilty going through this normal process of missing someone. It is important, however, that you don’t let this run for too long. Because in this case, that normal process becomes pathological and into what psychologists call “frozen grief”.
Although you are convinced that you have drawn a line, then in reality you have not finished with the situation. This limbo leads to increased stress and anxiety as you are still experiencing the intense effects of the person’s absence.
Why does it happen?
It is important to clarify that moving on does not mean simply forgetting the past. Instead, you learn to live with the memories in such a way that they don’t cause you pain. Remember that it is not easy for the brain to forget memories that are associated with meaningful and intense emotions.
This is due to the combination of neurotransmitters and hormones like oxytocin, serotonin, and dopamine that play a role in your personal relationships. When you are with someone you love, your body releases this wonderful chemical cocktail that induces intoxicating emotions.
After a breakup, when you are no longer with that person, your brain still needs its “dose” of neurochemicals to make you feel calm and serene. If they don’t get this dose, you will feel unbalanced and anxious.
If you miss someone who doesn’t miss you there is a solution
In the course of your life you will miss many people in different ways. You will feel nostalgia for old friends and co-workers and be in pain if you lose someone in a traumatic way. It’s natural to long for people who were important to you, especially when the relationship ended in complicated ways.
Meaningful relationships, especially romantic ones, often end without mutual agreement. Sometimes one person’s love dies or they fall in love with another person. Sometimes you are just not happy with some aspect of your significant other. In such situations, a person always bears the burden of unrequited love.
However, there is a solution for all of these cases, so don’t despair. While it’s not a quick miracle cure, you can still get on with your life if you commit to it. Let’s take a look at some effective strategies below:
If you miss someone who doesn’t miss you, cut off contact
While this can be difficult, it is important. Because when you miss someone, you will obviously try to get in touch with them. It’s easy to believe that if you just get one more chance to talk, you can win the person back.
However, if you really want to get over a breakup, you need to avoid situations like this. You should also stop following them on social media and avoid reading their comments and liking their posts.
Put aside your grudges
When a relationship ends in miseries, it’s easy to get angry or frustrated. Finding an explanation will lead you to blame yourself for what you did and didn’t do. At the same time, however, you are also blaming your ex for mistreating you. This only makes you feel worse and also hinders the grieving process.
Focus on new projects and goals
When you miss someone, you can anchor yourself in the past and get stuck there without escaping your pain and longing. You can’t go on and you can’t change.
Don’t get stuck. While you should miss the person you lost, this shouldn’t be going too far. Miss them just enough to draw a line and move on before your memories become a burden.